Meet NRI Singles

I've had a tumultuous love life... I had my first romance at three. Of course we both knew nothing could come of it – she was my teacher, and a nun – but the sexual tension was intense. At nine I had another affair with an older woman: she was eleven. Things got physical pretty fast – lots of hand-holding when nobody was looking – but she eventually got bored of me. I vividly remember being consumed with anguish. My early teens were dominated by an infatuation with a girl called Kate. Amazingly, despite staring at her constantly, telling her I loved her at every opportunity, and composing several pretty decent songs in her honour, I completely failed to get off with her. Strange. At seventeen I finally got my act together and found a girlfriend. Our first time was very romantic: all-night-long and candle-lit. We were in the shed at the bottom of her friend's garden. We stayed together for six years, but she came to her senses when I was 23. The next chapter involved large sums of money, traveling all over the place, and no shortage of naughtiness, but that's a story for another time. Suffice it to say I've become a hardened whiskey-drinking cynic in bad need of a good* woman to put him in line. Do you know anybody? J. * Bad girls also welcome.